Thursday, March 19, 2009

Government Morons...

I am non-too pleased with the situation of our government at this moment in time. 
I could spew- no - RANT about how disgusted I am with
Obama and some of his new, not-so-hot policies.
But it wouldn't get me anywhere.
Except to a pathetic party in the back of my mind
Where a gazzilion of my brain cells silently fume.

I think its unhealthy.

So I like throwing humor into the equation.
Maybe help balance things out.
Give my poor brain a break.
It works pretty hard.
Enjoy.

The Heaviest Element Known to Science

Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science.

The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.


Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of morons promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.


When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.


2 comments:

Steve and Chelle said...

HAA HAAA!!! chels, thats great! oh I needed a good laugh today!

And in response to your comment on my post- yes you will have your own kids to blog about! Soon?!? Funny that I would read that today, cause I totally just had a dream about you guys and you guys had a little girl! I'll tell you more about it later!

☂niki. said...

Your nose picking post was really funny.

I give you the letter H.

Have fun:)